Posted 8:52 AM by Duke

And sometimes those stereotypes are reversed:
Freshmen year, I asked a female friend of mine to my fraternity's Barn Dance party (it's a Michigan thing, I think- spiced/spiked apple cider, flasks, hay rides, flannel).

She says sure, that she'd love to go with me. We're just friends, but she's been told by her friends that she should be really nice to me. Because I'm Asian, she says. Because that means I'm going to be rich, she says.

And then the kicker.

"Besides, you're pretty cute for an Asian guy."

I immediately found a new date.

Okay, so maybe that second part was really more an affront to my pride than anything. I'm cute, period. "For an Asian guy" is just an unnecessary limiting of the set of cute guys of which I am a part. So where was I? Ah, Asian male stereotypes. We're supposed to be successful- as doctors, businessmen, lawyers, engineers. And we get those jobs because we all have deeply rooted Confucian work ethics. And crazy math skills.

I've also heard that Asian guys are supposed to be really frugal, which I suppose has some morsels of truth, depending on the guy, of course. One of my childhood friends has the most frugal parents I've ever seen. It rubbed off something terrible. When giving his sister her lunch money, he told her to just drink water, because milk by the half-pint was too expensive. His hand-me-downs were handed down threefold. He was the last member of Members Only. No one understood why, his family ran several successful businesses, they just didn't believe in buying furniture for the house. Maybe it's because first generation children don't normally come from parents immigrating with support from old money. The reason they came to the States in the first place was to find new opportunities for success and wealth creation. (Odd because you'll notice so many Asian families spoil their children, but that's another story completely.)

On the other hand, Asian males are thought to be so thoughtful and sensitive, sometimes altogether lacking that male-ness that others may have. Again a double-whammy, because sometimes Asian guys are thought to be totally into the machismo, unable and unwilling to back down from any challenge. Growing up under parents ruling with iron fists (and yet sons are treated like little tigers), we're allegedly unaware of the option to actually even consider risking authority. Of putting our shoe-less feet down on the carpet.

So Asian women are exoticized, made more desirable. Asian men are slaves to work, slaves to authority, lack power, and frugal. And not often attractive. Great, just great.

At least we've got that whole moody/brooding thing going on for us.