Posted 3:02 AM by Anonymous

So, my very gay cousin just called me. Finally. And we’re supposed to meet up for drinks over the weekend. I have to admit, I’m quite looking forward to it.

OK, the fact that he’s gay has never been, naturally, alluded to. Afterall, we’re a traditional, very Catholic family living in conservative ol’ Malaysia. Even though everyone KNOWS he’s gay, we don’t actually say so to his face and he never claims (or denies, come to think of it) to be so. It’s probably the biggest well-known secret in the family.

For years, people have always made fun of him. It’s almost the norm here – to make fun that is, of gay people, darker skinned people, fat people, mentally challenged people, generally anyone who’s “different”. It never used to faze me. After all, I didn’t know any better. But after I went away ... well, I remember coming back that first summer and hearing someone in the family making a joke about his feminine, disgusting ways. Calling him something along the lines of a big poof ... I was offended. I was. And upset.

But I still didn’t actually think I’d like to be friends with him. Cousin of mine though he may have been, he was still too odd, too easy to mock, too easy to look at and feel superior to because I was normal. In a way, I was as guilty as the rest of my family of prejudice and double standards.

Cut to the present. A wiser, more tolerant me. A me who’s been humbled by the fact that I too can be mocked by others simply because I was from a foreign land or because I didn’t have the perfect size 6 body. A me who appreciates now the differences in others, and not the familiar. Also, a me who’s a little lonely. A me who hung out with him at another cousin’s wedding and found him to be the most entertaining person there. A me who found that I could talk to him about clothes and fashion and beauty and hot men.

A me who’s changed my mind about the way I judge people, gay or otherwise.

So, I’m meeting him for drinks this weekend. And I am. Really looking foward to it.